One of the most terrifying situations for a parent to face is the prospect of a child with an eating disorder. Eating disorders manifest in a number of ways, from self-starvation to induced vomiting to obsessive dietary regulations. While many are quick to assume that eating disorders are only a female issue, plenty of males also suffer from such problems.
A number of factors can trigger an eating disorder to strike at any time. Unfortunately, it’s rather common for an eating disorder to develop during a person’s teenage years. As children grow into teenagers, their bodies obviously go through certain changes. At the same time, they also start becoming more self-conscious and self-aware. The closer teenagers creep towards adulthood, the more pressures they suddenly find themselves under. And to make matters worse, they’re often forced into the position of being old enough to get stressed out but being too young to take control and do something about it. The combination of hormones and mental anguish can all too easily result in an eating disorder that can affect a teenager both physically and mentally.
So what should a parent do if he discovers that his child has an eating disorder? According to licensed professional counselor Elliott Connie, the best and most important thing to do is to realize that eating disorders are dangerous and immediately get help. Many parents fail to comprehend that eating disorders are often more about taking control than they are about physical appearance. A child doesn’t have to be heavy in order to develop an eating disorder, nor does she have to be unpopular. In fact, plenty of children who develop eating disorders are often, according to their peers, looked upon as the least likely candidates to end up with such problems.
Since it’s extremely difficult, if not impossible, for the average parent to pinpoint the cause of his child’s eating disorder, it is imperative that any parent in this situation seek the help of a licensed counselor or therapist while having a medical doctor evaluate the child’s physical condition. Many parents foolishly assume that they can “talk some sense” into their children and get them to stop the unhealthy behavior. But in reality, parents are too close to the situation to handle it accurately and objectively. A parent might think that he knows his child better than any doctor or therapist, but that doesn’t make him an expert in dealing with eating disorders. Just as a parent would seek medical help for a child with a persistent cough and fever, so too should he consult with a professional to treat an eating disorder.
Another thing that many fail to realize is that when it comes to eating disorders, the parents, as well as the rest of the family, might actually be part of the problem. In fact, eating disorders tend to develop in teenagers who choose to bear the burden of the entire family’s problems and dysfunction. Under these circumstances, it is often the case that the whole family needs fixing, not just the affected teen. In fact, Elliott Connie has seen plenty of situations in which the rest of the family has needed more therapy than the child with the actual disorder. Since it takes a trained, objective outsider to pinpoint these types of family-based triggers, it’s crucial that parents turn to the professionals instead of attempting to tackle eating disorders on their own. Otherwise, they run the risk of actually, though unintentionally, making the situation worse.
Of course, this isn’t to say that a parent can’t play an active role in helping his child overcome an eating disorder. Under the auspices of a trained professional, a parent can reach out to a child and assist her in altering the line of thinking that is causing such a problem. Since most eating disorders are rooted in self-esteem and control issues, a parent can do things to build his child’s self-esteem and give her the illusion of control to help her break the cycle of engaging in unhealthy behavior. Parents shouldn’t be expected to simply sit back and let the doctor and therapist run the show. But, at the same time, they must heed the directions of such professionals and accept that they are better equipped to adequately handle the problem.
A good parent will always act with his child’s best interests in mind. When it comes to eating disorders, a parent’s seemingly good intentions can backfire in a way that puts the child in further jeopardy. So if you do find yourself in the terrifying situation of having a child with an eating disorder, then swallow that parental pride, take a step back, and get help. It just might save your child’s life.
The information in the article is not intended to substitute for the medical expertise and advice of your healthcare provider. We encourage you to discuss any decisions about treatment or care with an appropriate healthcare provider.
